Free gaff!

THE folks were away there last weekend for a few days visiting an aunt across the water, so I had the gaff to myself. I even took a couple of days off work to enjoy it!

Bliss.

Before any of you start getting smutty, there were no bedroom shenanigans (not for want of trying, but none of the youngfellas on Saturday wanted to come home with me, kids these days) it was just four days of pure me time.

No endless watching of Heartbeat.

No questions like "are you sure you don't want a breaded turkey breast from the freezer" on a loop over and over again.

No 'interesting' conversations about what 'yer woman' in number 48 put in her bin at lunchtime.

No hoovers at ungodly hours - in fact, no hoovers AT ALL.

No hours and hours of dusting the skirting boards while I'm trying to read, like anyone EVER looks at them. (I mean EVER. Even if the Pope did deign to grant us a visit, I doubt the first thing he'd do is get on his knees and inspect the bloody skirting boards).

Nothing, in fact, except me, the television and the contents of our medium sized fridge. After almost a year at home with the folks (and six months of that being nursed back to full-ish health by Mammy Dunne after I was ill) I really needed the time to just be quiet and alone. And boy was I!

Saturday:
Got up, late.
Ate breakfast IN THE SITTING ROOM
Watched Nickleodeon WHILE EATING MY BREAKFAST
Faffed about
Faffed about some more
Left dirty dishes in the sink
Had a shower, put on make up, got dressed
Went out
Got drunk
Came home late
Went to bed.

(All of the above, bar the getting drunk bit, was carried out in blissful silence)

Sunday:
Same as Saturday, except instead of going out and getting drunk, I went for dinner in a pub with my sister. Everything was again in silence, my sister is very understanding.

Monday:
Same as previous days, except only went out to go to the chemist to fill my prescription. Again, there was minimal talking, my pharmacist is also very understanding.

Tuesday: (The day of the return)
Same as previous days, except realised that was eating my cereal out of a gravy boat and using a wooden spoon cos all of the other utensils were dirty, so did some washing up.

Tuesday night, when they arrived back:
Covered my ears as the house was once again filled with conversation. Tried to watch Desperate Housewives while glowering at them as they noisily unpacked.

(I know I sound like an ungrateful wench, and maybe I am, but I really enjoyed the alone time and could have done with a few more days. I'm not a truly horrible person though, cos I did prepare a welcome home supper for them with their favourite rolls, filling and cake, so I think that earned me some karma points.)

They're back now though so I'll just have to get on with it...though I did read in a magazine once about a company that builds sheds in your back garden that are 'just like your real sitting room'......hmmm I wonder how the Dunnes would feel about that?